Do you ever find yourself concocting an imaginary conversation with someone in your mind? Perhaps, you begin to think of a fictional scenario in which you have been wronged in some way. You begin to imagine how you might react and what you might say. Negative day dreams are just as common as our dreams of winning the lottery, falling in love or becoming an overnight sensation. However the similarities stop there.
Visualising yourself in positive scenarios can boost your emotions, confidence, energy levels and even your immunity. On the other hand, thinking of the argument you would have if your partner were to betray you leads to a downward spiral of anger, resentment, despondency, lethargy and compromises your immune system. Of course this can then lead to real life arguments because by the time your partner comes home, you are decidedly irritable, although you are not quite sure why (your daydream but a faded memory now); and you just put it down to hormones or some trivial issue that would have been overlooked at any other time.
From a health perspective, the mind cannot tell the difference between fact and fiction. Whilst thinking of a negative scenario seems intangible, its physical effects on the body are quite real – not to mention the energetic effect on the person you were directing your emotions onto in your daydream.
So what to do? The first step is to be aware of your thoughts. When you find yourself imagining that your meeting will be boring, stop yourself. When you begin to think of the imaginary argument you will have with your ex-spouse because of some wrongful act that they may or may not do....stop.
Step two, visualise the opposite. Visualise an interesting, successful meeting. Visualise a harmonious interaction between you and your ex-spouse. Just a moment of positive imagery can counteract the energetic effects of your negative scenario.
Step three – let go and bring your mind into the present such as the task at hand or something pleasing in your surrounding environment.
Be aware. Visualise the positive. Focus on the present. With time and practise you will find that your mind will bypass the negative thinking and go straight to step two or three, leaving you with pleasant imagery, mindful presence and most importantly, a healthy mind.